real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize