Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Randomize
