And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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