piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
