so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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