ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
