if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
