what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
