I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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