She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
