Even water is tasting like jack daniels
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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