i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
