If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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