I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
