we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Randomize
