I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Randomize
