I should be sponsored by Trojan
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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