he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
