i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
