First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
