Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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