Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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