so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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