nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
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