i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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