He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
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