if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
