Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
she told me i tasted like america
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
