he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
