quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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