I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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