Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
