I love black thongs
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
