Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
