drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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