I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
