38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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