And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Blow job season was short but glorious.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
