No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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