She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
