addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
We're too hungover to prance.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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