something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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