you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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