problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
