this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
