1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize