Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize