Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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