My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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