he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
